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Post by `holly johnson. on Jul 1, 2009 23:22:23 GMT -5
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every waves drags me to sea
------------------------------------------------[/center] Holly Elizabeth Marie Johnson nervously sat on the edge of the bathtub in the bathroom she shared with three of her best friends in the entire world. She kept staring from the door, to the top of the toilet and back, scared that someone was going to need to use the bathroom within the next seven minutes. Deciding that she needed a good excuse for why she was taking so long, as she had been in the bathroom for a good ten minutes already, just staring at the box, scared to open yet another one that would tell her news she did not want to hear, Holly turned on the tub and let it fill up with water. She could use the excuse that she had taken a bath. Biting her lower lip, she stared at the clock on the wall above the medicine cabinet. Why was the seconds hand moving so slowly?
She couldn’t believe that she had gotten herself into the mess she was in. Holly was used to having everything go her way, but this….this was definitely not a situation that she had seen herself getting into for many years yet. For pete sake! Holly was only seventeen, she still had a life to live, things to do, an acting career to start. She couldn’t possibly be…..dare she even say it….pregnant. What would she do with a baby? She was still a kid herself, how could she be responsible for a life that wasn’t hers? She was not old enough, mature enough, good enough to do that. Maybe this was Gods way of punishing her for sleeping around before she was married. Maybe this was some cruel sick joke that the universe decided to play on her.
If she had known about six months ago what position she was in now, Holly would have never allowed what happened to happen. She had never really meant to sleep with Edward. Of course the girl had not minded it. If she would stop lying to herself, she would realize that she was absolutely madly in love with the boy, but she would not admit it herself, let alone him, for she was afraid of what would happen. Yet, that night she had let herself give into certain emotions, and it had led to a string of things that landed her where she was now. Pregnant. Or hopefully not. Though why she held on to the thought that she wasn’t was beyond understanding, as she had taken three other home tests, and they had all come out positive as well. If Holly was smart, she would have just gone to the doctor, but she was terrified of someone finding out.
What she was even more terrified of was telling Edward. There was no doubt in her mind who the baby belonged to. Sure, she had slept around a bit in the last six months that she was sleeping with Edward, but she hadn’t slept with anyone but Edward in at least the last four months, and she knew she wasn’t that far along. She had done research at the library [so that if anyone asked, she could say she was doing research for a paper] and had learned that she would start showing at about two and a half to three months. She could notice that she was getting a little bit pudgy, but it would not be noticeable to anyone else. She could only notice it when she was in her bra and panties, and no one else had seen her in only that in weeks, and it had not been that long ago that she had first noticed it.
Granted, her morning sickness was a great sign pointing to the fact she was pregnant. For the last month and a half, she had been making at least two trips to the porcelain bucket to deposit any and every thing she had consumed that day. At first Holly had just thought that she had the flu, but as she continued to not get better, she started to realize what it really was. Knowing that she could not let her roommates get suspicious, she had learned to turn on the sink before she puked (And it was not easy to do, you know, turn on the faucet while trying not to puke) to cover the sound. It had not been easy, hiding this for so long. She still clung onto the hope that this final test would show a negative.
Glancing to the clock, she saw that she had actually waited fifteen minutes, rather than the seven. Jumping up quickly, she walked over to the toilet and held up the stick. Her heart sank to her stomach when her eyes read the one word she dreaded the most ‘pregnant’. She felt like she was going to be sick. Quickly dropping to her knees, she flipped open the toilet lid and emptied her stomach of its contents. Damn, she really hated puking. Finally pulling herself together, she took the stick and placed it in the trash, and covering it up with unused toilet paper. Normally she would take the trash out immediately, but she wasn’t too worried. She did all of the house work in the dorm, she was confident that no one would touch the trash at all, so she was safe to take it out when she was finally over the shock of her news.
Holly shut off the water in time to hear the door shut. She naturally assumed that it was her roommates leaving. Grabbing her toothbrush, she brushed the nastiness out of her teeth before finally unlocking the bathroom door. If she would have fully been there, she would have realized that she hadn’t actually gotten into the bath, so her hair wasn’t wet nor had she changed out of her bed clothes. Under normal circumstances Holly would have covered her tracks well, but this wasn’t normal circumstances for Holly. Holly had finally come to the brutal reality that she was indeed with child, and she was going to have to tell Edward eventually, because he was going to notice her getting fat. Abortion had popped into her mind immediately, but that was something that Holly could never do. She had always been against it, and just because she was in the situation now did not mean she was going to change sides.
She knew she was going to have to tell Edward, but she also knew that she didn’t want to do it. She was terrified of his reaction. Not that she ever thought of him as a bad person, but she knew that he would be angry and upset. She herself was angry and upset. If he yelled at her, she knew she would lose it. She could not tell him face to face. Maybe she would make plans to go to New York for the weekend, and text him right before her plane left, then ‘accidently’ lose her phone somewhere in the Big Apple. Or maybe she would tell Andie, and have Andie tell Edward. God, she was a coward. She really knew that she couldn’t raise a baby now, she could not even tell the father she was pregnant!
Making her way out of the bathroom, she walked about the dorm like a zombie before finally sitting down on the couch. She flipped on the tv before pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs. She stared directly at the TV screen, yet she couldn’t tell you a thing that was happening, or even what she was watching. Her mind was a buzz with thoughts and worries, her heart was pounding about ninety to nothing as reality set in. This was the end of her acting career. She could never do it now. She could not go to college and raise a child! Hell, she wasn’t even sure if she would be able to finish her senior year. Her entire life was going to change. She felt the tears fall silently down her cheek. She really wasn’t worried about someone seeing her, she was still an actress, if someone asked why she was crying, she could convince them it was killer cramps. She almost laughed at the irony of it all.
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tag! Edward//Sara <3
word count! 1,385
music! Nothing! Le Gasp!
outfit! Here
misc! Ehhhhhh.
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Post by ` edward moore . on Jul 19, 2009 19:39:52 GMT -5
* [/color] how could you be so ,[/color]  ( [/color]SO HEARTLESS )[/color][/font][/size] -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -[/b][/color][/center] A brand new school year was exactly what Edward Moore needed to put him in a blissful mood. It seemed as if just when he started to grow bored of his classes a new semester or school year would start up and relieve him. It was a bit of a secret that he enjoyed classes so much. He did not enjoy showing off his nerdy side though he will be the first to tell you that he will likely be valedictorian. He was spending a lot of his time in the school library picking up every book that looked interesting and vowing to have them all read by the end of the semester. He seemed to have much luck this year. He was rooming with Holly, Preston, and Andie. He got on extremely well with all of them and had close with each of them individually since his freshman year. Well, he went back with Holly far longer than that and knew her better than he did his own twin brother. It would likely be impossible to find a closer pair. They were forever being mistaken for a couple and at most times, Edward didn’t bother correcting them. It always gave him a giddy feeling in the pit of his stomach to hear the accusation. He liked to think most people were oblivious to his love for the girl but was sure that was not the case. His male best friend Preston was always teasing the two. He was the only one who knew exactly what was going on in his head as far as Holls was concerned as if he told Andie he couldn’t be sure it would just stay between them. Besides, he did not like admitting the words allowed as she was the only girl that seemed to be out of his reach.
Swallowing hard at the thoughts that were constantly invading his mind, he stared at the water ahead of him. Most days you could find Edward somewhere around the park, he was a boy that enjoyed his alone time. He had far too many thoughts and he felt as if this was one of the few places he could escape. He would walk around aimlessly for hours, most times completely ignoring any text messages or phone calls he received. He could go missing and no one would worry for ages, just think that he was off and in one of his moods. He caught sight of another person walking about the lake alone, he was pretty certain he recognized her from school. He gave her a bit of a smile, not wanting to come across as rude. Plus, who could resist a girl with blonde hair. She returned the gesture but soon was off elsewhere which left him feeling somewhat disappointed. He shrugged it off though, he was sure that had he tried he could have engaged in a conversation and perhaps more. He was extremely confident in most his attempts with women. After all, he had yet to be denied even when he chased after the ladies that were referred to as lost causes. He always seemed to have the right words to say without having to think about it. Lately, he had not worried about that as much. Why would he when he could have Holly whenever he wanted? No one had measured up ever since the night they had first slept together. He was sure no one would again. She was far too perfect at absolutely everything she tempted. It was quite astonishing really. He had never been more impressed with a person.
A disgruntled noise made it’s way through Edward’s mouth as he attempted to think of anything but Holly. His eyes looked up at the sky watching as a plane passed, he could not help but wish he was one of the people seated comfortably in the airplane. It would be absolutely wicked to get out of Sandusky for awhile, to get away from anything and everything that brought him down. Sure, it would likely get old fast and he would find himself in the same rut as he was now, but a day would be a decent break. His parents were currently vacationing in Hawaii and had not bothered inviting himself or any of his siblings or taking the trip earlier so that they could tag along without having to worry about missing school. They had never been all that considerate of their children, but he had long ago grown used to it. He knew that they cared about him, he just was not their top priority. He had long ago vowed to pay loads more attention to his own kids once he had them, many years from now. He would be a good dad always being there to help with a school project or any other obstacles they might face. He would never understand why people would have children if they were not going to give them an ounce of their time. He was also pretty certain he wanted to adopt, he hated the thought of a child with no one to care for them. Yet again, this would be a long time in the future. He was no where near ready for that sort of responsibility in this stage of his life. Not to say that he was not mature, but he was not mature enough in that sense. He would have no idea what to do.
Looking down at his watch, he figured it was about time for him to start heading home. He was quite happy he had decided to drive down there instead of walk as his legs honestly did not feel like carrying him any farther. Sliding the keys into the ignition, Edward sped towards the dormitories hoping someone would be home. He kept his stereo on low and half smiled as the sound of a violin reached his ears. Classical music was a bit of a guilty pleasure of his that he had picked up from his mother. It seemed as if he was in the parking lot in the matter of seconds, and he found himself heading up to dorm 104. Not bothering to knock, he took out his keys and entered the door only to see his best friend curled up and crying on the couch. A look of concerned immediately took over his features as he was instantly at her side and pulling her close to him without a second thought. ”Holly, what is wrong?” He asked gently as he ran a hand through her blonde hair. If anyone was making her cry like this they were going to be destroyed, male or female, friend or foe.
[/size][/font] ----------------- [/b][/color][/center] TAG !?[/b] sammie/holly, who else? <33456 WORDS !?[/b] one hundred eighteen NOTES !?[/b] i love my muse? :] CREDITS !?[/b] this template was made by DANCING.DIVA of CAUTION 2.0! and banner to CAUTION 2.0[/color][/font] |
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Post by `holly johnson. on Jul 19, 2009 23:01:29 GMT -5
All my sand castles fall like the ashes of cigarettes
And every waves drags me to sea
------------------------------------------------[/center] Pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant. The word bounced around her head like a bouncy ball. The small tears that had started falling down her face gave away to bigger tears, and she felt herself lose it. It wasn’t too often that Holly would full out cry. Sure, she was a girl, she was emotional and she couldn’t always stop tears from falling down her face, but she could count the times that she had actually bawled in the last five or so years on one hand. The tears shook her body, and she could hear herself sobbing. She knew she looked pathetic, and this only made her cry more. She hated looking weak like this, even if no one else was around to be a witness to it. She was at least grateful for that. She couldn’t bear for someone to witness this. She knew that Andromeda and Edward would be overly concerned, and Preston would be concerned for a moment before making fun of her for it. Preston had his moments of niceness, but he tended to ruin them by being an ass shortly afterward.
Holly was so wrapped up in her own thoughts and misery, that she didn’t even hear Edward unlock the lock or open the door. In fact, she wasn’t even aware that he was there at all until she felt his strong arms around her, pulling her towards him and heard him ask her what was wrong. She almost wanted to laugh at herself. What was wrong? The easier question would have been what wasn’t wrong. Instead of being cynical and sarcastic, she just sobbed harder at this question. She buried her face in his shirt as she felt his fingers run through her hair. She wasn’t going to even attempt to talk to him until she could knock off this foolishness and get her act together. She allowed herself a few more seconds of crying before she finally started talking a few deep breaths, and started willing herself to not cry.
Finally getting her act together, she wiped at her eyes with the palm of her hand as she tried to think of the excuse she was going to use if someone asked her what was wrong. Dang it! Why wouldn’t it come to her? With a sigh, she backed away from Edward, and out of his arms. She looked at him and gave very small, obviously forced smile before saying “Nothing Eddie. Nothing is wrong dear.” [/color] She wiped at her eyes once more before taking another deep breath and turning to Edward. Her new objective was to keep Edward talking so that he would press the matter any further. So…Where were you? I assume the park, as that is where you normally disappear to. You just missed Andie and Preston. I think Andie went to the mall, but I am not entirely certain about Preston. I assume to Razzles, as he failed yet again with Andie. Its almost kind of funny how pathetic his attempts are.’[/color] Now Holly was just rambling with no point to what she was saying. But so far, it seemed to be working. Pausing for a moment, she silently asked herself what she was doing. Edward Moore was her best friend. She had never, ever kept anything from him before, nothing in the entire seventeen years she had known the boy. She could count on one hand how many times he had ever been upset with her. Why was she so frightened to tell him this? Because he will not want anything to do with me after he knows the words rang through her mind, but in the back of it, she knew those words weren’t true. Not of Edward. He was far too much of a gentleman to leave a lady like that, especially his best friend. Granted, Holly knew that he was not going to be thrilled. One thing she was certain of was the fact he would probably not take it well. Hell, she didn’t expect him to. This wasn’t something that most people would just be all ‘Oh…cool.’ about. But maybe she could keep this from him for a bit longer…like another seven or so months. Yes…like that would work. Ha. She could laugh at herself and her stupid ideas sometimes. But still, the thought of telling Edward the real reason she had been crying was as appealing to her as swimming in a lake with a bunch of electric eels was. Staring at Edward for a few moments, Holly finally gave a defeated sigh. She knew she could not keep this from Edward. Keeping this from Edward would hurt her more than telling him. If there was one person she could not stand lying to, or keeping things from, it was Edward Alexander Moore. She swallowed hard before taking another deep breath. Taking one of his hands into her own hands she ran one of her thumbs over the back of it as she searched for the right way to start this. Why was this much harder than she needed it to be? “Edward….”[/color] she started off, avoiding his eyes, “ Look, there is something I really need to tell you…I’m afraid its going to be hard to hear, and I really hate to have to say it.”[/color] She paused for a moment to blink back a few tears that threatened to spill over. Stupid hormones. Collecting herself once again, she glanced up at him before looking back down and quietly saying ”I’mpregnantandhavethoughtsoforaboutamonthandahalf. Pleasedonthateme."[/color] she bit at her bottom lip and prepared for the explosion that she was sure was going to come. [/blockquote] ------------------------------------------------
tag! Edward//Sara <3
word count! 941
music! Nothing! Le Gasp!
outfit! Here
misc! This one is pretty much crappy and needs to be burned on a stake =]
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